DIary of a Pain Whore – Chapter 4

That was the beginning of our lives together, from that night on we began eating together and sleeping together. Rules were established and my boundaries were set, he told me he would trust me to be part of his life as long as I always obeyed him. He even let me start working by cleaning the rooms. For the first time in my life I felt like I was part of a real family, almost everyone accepted me right away and brought me into their circle. Most of the girls loved me, if for nothing more than taking Johnny’s wrath, he no longer beat or raped any of the girls and they were happier than they had ever been, though a few of them felt very uncomfortable around me because I was so young. One of the girls in particular was horrified by what I allowed Johnny to do to me, so her and I rarely spoke. Carl and Jake hardly ever spoke to me either but when they did they were nice enough, Todd on the other hand seemed to hate me, and the feeling was mutual. I thought he was an uptight faggot and told him so as often as possible. He just called me cunt, which I secretly loved. I had seen him watching me and I knew he wanted me, I knew men and the angrier I made him the more he wanted me. Every time I sported a new injury he would shake his head and sneer at me calling me a stupid cunt. I was happier than I had ever been, but still afraid all the time of being rejected and replaced, so I continued to do all I could to make sure Johnny needed me and that he knew he no one else on earth would let him abuse them and love it the way I did. I went about my life cleaning the hotel rooms and being Johnny’s everything, wearing my bruises and cuts proudly.

I loved wearing his marks, the marks of Johnny’s love, thats what I would call them and he would always laugh, asking, “who the hell said I loved you?” and ruffle my hair or slap my ass. I would just smile because I knew that Johnny was falling in love with me. We had been together for almost a year the first time he uttered the words, but I would never refer to it, I knew at the time he said them he wished he could take them back and if I ever mentioned it to him it would be a horrible mistake. But the memory of it was mine, and no one could ever take it away from me. I had gotten comfortable with our life and now and then would forget myself and get too familiar with Johnny in front of people and he would punish me severely, not bothering to wait until we were alone. The night he said he loved me it was uttered in a passionate frenzy after one such punishment.

Once a month Johnny got together with a few of his friends including Todd, Carl and Jake; they always played poker and drank. At first I would stay in the bedroom during these loud escapades, but after a few months I felt comfortable enough to come out to get food, and sometimes even stop and watch for awhile. I don’t know what was going through my head really, I’m not sure if I was really stupid enough to be trying to please Johnny or if I was trying to see how much I could get away with. I was certainly feeling confident. While Johnny and the guys were still at the bar I set up the table and put out bowls of chips and dip. I was wearing one of the three jersey dresses he allowed me to own and turned smiling as the door opened. The six of them came boisterously through the door laughing and all talking at once. Johnny quieted as he saw her, narrowed his eyes and looked around the room. A cruel smile spread across his lips as he strode toward me.

“Look here, boys, we have a hostess.” He reached out and grabbed my hair, pulling me tightly against him, growling into my face. “Is that what you think you are, Sarah. Once again you’re confused about what the fuck you are. Haven’t we had this conversation, you stupid whore?” He pushed me away from him and ordered me to remove the dress. The laughing group of men stood quietly watching. I glanced up at them through my disheveled hair and met Todd’s eyes, he smirked and crudely rubbed at his crotch. I pulled my dress over my head and let it drop, my face, neck and chest splotchy red in my embarrassment. Todd laughed out loud and then Johnny joined him, pushing me toward the kitchen, “get some beers.”

I quickly did as I was told as they sat at the table and started their game. I handed each of them an opened bottle of beer and then went to the stereo tuning it into Johnny’s favorite station. As heavy metal late 1970s rock filled the room I closed my eyes and swayed, then turning noticed Johnny facing me, leaning back in his chair watching me like a wolf might watch a hare. My eyes widened at the look on his face, the familiar muscle twitch in his jaw gave me goose flesh, my breasts swelled and my nipples hardened. With one finger he called me to him and I quickly dropped to my hands and knees and crawled to him.

“Are you fucking kidding with that?” he laughed scornfully and pulled me up by my hair until my face was within inches of his own. I had never seen him so angry, and I was panting in fear and anticipation. With fury he spoke loudly into my face, “Nothing. But. A. Hole.” With that he threw me to the floor and kicked me, standing he removed his belt. “You overstep yourself,” he yelled as he palmed the buckle of the belt and raised his arm to lash me with the rest. “Move it, whore.” I crawled as quickly as I could in front of him, the lash of the belt as it hit me wildly burning and stinging against my back, ass, and thighs. I screamed as it wrapped around me licking at my stomach and chest.

As he drove me into the bathroom I heard laughter and his friend Eric’s deep voice, “Damn, that shit is hot.”

In the bathroom Johnny whipped and kicked me into the bathtub and continued to lash at me with the belt as I curled into a ball as far away from him as I could. He stopped and dropped the belt onto the floor, I looked up at him as he opened his jeans. “I guess we have to start over.” I moaned in horrified frustration as a hot arc of piss splashed onto me. “Look at me, toilet hole.” I flinched and turned to face him, on my knees in the tub as he urinated all over my chest and stomach. “This is where you will stay, hole.” He shook the last few droplets at me and fixed his pants, leaving me crying in the tub. I could hear more laughter and low-voiced conversation, but not what they were saying. My knees began to ache and I sat back in the tub and rested my head against the back, cold and miserable. I don’t know how long I lay there before the door opened and Eric walked in and approached the tub unzipping his jeans.

“Spread.” I turned my face to the wall and let my legs fall open. “Oh no, pretty hole, I want to see your face.” I turned back to him, but kept my eyes lowered and he laughed as a tear rolled down my cheek. He aimed himself between my legs and I flinched as the hot stream slammed onto me. I was surprised at the force of it and it was so hot, against my own will I moaned and arched a bit. Eric sucked in his breath and muttered, “dear God.” He finished up and left the bathroom leaving the door open behind him. As the time dragged by and most of them had been in to piss on me, I was hoping that it was almost over. Just as I was about to doze off in my uncomfortable surroundings I heard the door shut softly. I looked up and froze, Todd stood there glaring at me, his thin lips almost disappearing in his tight-mouthed look of disgust.

“I’ve been thinking about this all night, cunt.” He slowly walked toward me and I watched yet another man unzip his jeans and reach inside. I was looking at his face and didn’t look down at his crotch until he was right above me, when I did I gasped. The huge dick in his fist surprised me and filled me with a quivering ache. My eyes flew back up to his and he laughed. Todd raised one leg up and planted his booted foot onto the side of the tub against the wall and aimed the head of his cock right at my face and I panicked. Shaking my head I tried to get away from the hot spray hitting my face. He made a game of it pissing all over my face, neck and breasts; crudely reaching down to pull me up by the hair, slapping the last drops off onto my face. I was furious, and thoroughly humiliated.

Johnny came into the bathroom and glared at my flushed face, reaching down he shoved my legs apart and pushed one finger inside me. He smirked as it slid easily into the warm soft wetness. He stood and turned the shower on, hauling me up by the arm he held me under the spray and then turned it off and pulled me behind him out of the bathroom. Tugging me back into the dining room he pushed me facedown over the table holding me there by the back of my neck.

“Ante up, boys, highest card gets first pick.”

A loud, confusing game began between Eric, Jake and Todd, each of them throwing a wad of money on the table in front of my face. I saw Carl and Dale sitting back, watching and quietly talking to each other. Todd shouted in triumph “I’ll take that filthy mouth” and Johnny laughed. A few seconds later I was hauled to my feet again and pushed by Johnny to the couch. Eric lay back on the couch and pulled me up to straddle him, he sucked one throbbing nipple into his mouth as he thrust up into my pussy. Todd grabbed two handfuls of my hair and poked at my face with his very large, very hard cock pressing roughly against my lips. My mind was spinning, this was more than I had bargained for. All thought flew out of my head as Todd reached around and pinched my nose, cramming his cock into my mouth as soon as I opened it to take a breath. Eric was chewing on one nipple as he rocked up into me and my pussy clenched around him. I opened my mouth as wide as I could to accommodate Todd’s huge cock but choked and gagged as he slammed it deep and hard into my face. I felt Jake crawl up behind me and pull the cheeks of my ass apart. He pressed the hood of his uncut cock against the tight little muscle, using his thumbs to pull me further apart as he pushed deeper and deeper into my ass.

I was in ecstasy as they filled me, Todd slamming into my mouth, one hand on my head, the other one on my chin; hot foamy spit dripping off my lips and over his hand, tears running down my face as he rammed my throat. He was taking me hard, grunting and saying “take it, cunt, take it,” over and over. Eric’s fingers were digging into my hips as he thrust into me and Jake was stroking in and out of my ass at a frantic pace. Just as I started cumming Johnny reached in and pulled me from them pushing me to the floor and the three of them stood in front of me pulling at their wet cocks until they were cumming, all of them spurting into my face, hair and chest.

“Leave.” Johnny screamed. The look of utter rage on his face was frightening and all of them scurried as quickly as they could out the door. He turned on me as soon as they were gone and slapped me so hard I tasted blood. There was a deep ringing in my ears and I couldn’t hear what he was screaming, but I could see him screaming at me. He jerked his clothes off and dropped to a knee next to me he wrapped his hands around my throat and started to squeeze, then pulled his hands back covered in his friend’s cum and bellowed in rage. Wiping it into my face, forcing my mouth open and jamming his fingers into my mouth, gagging me. “You fuck!” he screamed at me and reached for his pants, “you are MINE.” He pulled his pocket knife out of his pocket and opened it. Maneuvering between my legs he pushed his fully engorged cock into my wet swollen pussy and sliced across the top of my breasts. As a strip of blood welled in the shallow cut he moaned and ran his other hand into the blood and then gripping my left breast in his fingers began to carve his initials into the sensitive skin of the under-swell, JCD, in deep jagged letters. I screamed and thrashed at the exquisite cold burning followed by liquid fire that spread throughout my chest. I dug my fingernails into his shoulders and screamed, “Oh, fuck yes” as I came. He dropped the knife and squeezed my bloody breast in his palm and pumped savagely and I screamed again as his cock jumped and pulsed until his hot cum poured into me.

Afterward we lay there on the floor entwined and he inched down to lay his head on my rib cage, pressing his fingers against the his initials and then his tongue, finally rubbing his cheek against the burning, oozing cuts, I heard him whisper “oh my God, I love you, Sarah.” I sucked in my breath and tightened my arms around him and he immediately pulled away from me, standing and looking down coldly. “Go take a shower” was the last thing he said to me for the next two days.