We all have a few dark secrets that we want to keep hidden; some of us manage to retain those secrets to the grave, others…well who knows? These are my secrets, I never wanted them reveled, but as I approach the end of my road, I thought, maybe, I may be able to expunge from my memory the guilt and uncertainties which have blighted my life. I can never be sure that I did not just allow it to happen, that if I had just had the courage to tell someone, then things and my life might have turned out differently. The names and places are all changed, (for my peace of mind not to protect the guilty!) as my family and friends have never been aware of any of these happenings. As far as I am concerened this is a most unpalatable story, but I have writen it as it remains in my mind. I can only apologise should it cause offence.

Chapter 1

I had been hiding in the barn out back of the farm; it had been great…until THEY arrived. I had been indentured when I left school at fourteen, the same as all the kids in town. The only difference between them and myself was they looked fourteen, whilst I resembled a puny little nine year old. As I have already said, it was good when I arrived at the farm, I was the only youngster there at the time and for a few weeks I really enjoyed myself, being with the animals and savoring the country side all around. I didn’t have to work very hard, as the farmer thought I was too small to manage any of the jobs on the farm, so I only had to look after the aria where I lived and try to keep it clean. then one day the farmer told me that some more boys were coming to the farm, though he understood they were older than me and they would be working on the farm for their keep. When I heard this I was quite looking forward to meeting them.

When they first arrived, they seemed OK; they didn’t know each other even though they came from the same part of downtown. It was pretty tough down in their aria, and it was only later that I found they had all been to jail or reformatory at one time or another. They were introduced to me as Tad, Rogo, Bimmy and Jad, their ages ranged between sixteen to eighteen. “Whats your namesquirt, and how old are you?” asked Jad, “Billy and I’m fourteen” I answered. “Jeez, you only look about nine or ten,” he said derisisivly. A childhood illness had stunted my growth. The farmer asked me to show them where they were sleeping, so I took them up to the room they were to share. They looked around the room in a disgruntaled fashion and wanted to know where I slept, as there were only four beds in the room. I told them that I had a room along the passage from them; our part of the farmhouse was seperate from the rest of the house.

When the trouble began, I can’t really say, it started so gradually that at first I didn’t notice anything, and just excepted the teasing and occasional thump as part of their normal make up, after all they had come from a very rough aria and had probably had a hard up bringing. I do realise that it sounds a pretty adult way of looking at their behavior, but it was more years ago than I care to remember and I am looking at it now from an adult prospective. Although; what happened during the next two years and what they put me through, I think that if ever I met them again, I would probably take my revenge in the most diabolical way. But at that time I was so painfully naive, that even though I wished I were bigger and could have given them a bloody good thrashing, I just excepted what they did and kept it too myself, not only because I was so scared of them, but also I didn’t really think anyone would believe me. The bullying escalated to the point where I tried to hide myself in various places around the farm so they wouldn’t find me…but one evening they did….

It all started with them dragging me down from the bales of straw where I had hidden, and pushing me from one to the other as they stood in a circle, until I was so dizzy that I tripped and fell. As I lay on the floor of the barn, on of them said something about “having a bit of fun”, then they started to suggest rather childish things such as, hanging me from the beams by my feet, or burying me in the middle of the straw stack or stripping me and making me run round the farm in the nude. The last suggestion was excepted as what they would do, then laughing and swareing began to pull my clothes off. I was, of course, struggling and yelling at the top of my voice, hopeing the farmer may hear me. “Stuff something in his mouth” shouted one of them, and a rag or something was shoved roughly into my mouth choking of my shouts. Then things started to get really ugly, as they pulled my slacks and pants off together. As I stood completely nacked in front of them, trying to cover myself with my hands, they started to prod and poke me with remarks such as “Skinny little runt, an’t he?” and “Look at his prick, you can ardly see it”, said one of them. “Grab old of im and well see if we can give im a ard on” laughed Bimmy, and as of the others grabbed my arms, he started to roughly yank at my diminutive prick, but he hurt so much that I was almost crying, though it didn’t do me any good. When they realised that I wasn’t getting excited, they pushed me down over a bale of straw. “As he don’t seem to be able to get a hard on, perhaps he leans the other way?” sneered Rogo. I didn’t understand that last remark, “Tell ya what, go and get a carrot or a cucumber, somfing big, ta fuck him wiv, and see if that gets im going” he sniggered. Jad left the barn as Bimmy started to slap my arse as hard as he could, much to the amusment of the other two holding me down. I tried to scream but the gag muffled every noise I made, I had a go at kicking them, but had no success, they just laughed and he slapped harder. By the time they had finished, I was bawling my eyes out and attempting to cover my arse with my hands when I managed to yank them free through my struggling. Just then Jad returned with a grin on his face, “Couldn’t find a cucumber, but got something better, bet he really feels this up his shit shoot” he laughingly told them as he led the farm guard dog into the barn. That dog was the biggest rottweiler that I had ever seen, in fact it was the only rott I had seen, but in all my life I had never seen a bigger dog, I’m not joking he was really massive, but he had always been gentle with me when we had messed around together, so when I saw him I was not unduly worried. “”What the fucking hell have you bought that fucking thing for?” asked Rogo, “You said bring something to fuck him with, well…I’ve got something”, answered Jad. “What; use the dog? Come off it…you must be joking…it’ll fucking kill him!” The smiles and grins had left their faces now as they looked at Jad to see if he was serious. Thick I might have been and slow with it, but I suddenly realised what they intended to do and I was horrified and struggled so desperately that I managed to break free; I tore the gag from my mouth and as I couldn’t get out of the barn door, scrambled in fear and desperation up the stack of bales, screaming at the top of my voice for help, terrified they would really do what they were threatening. Tad and Rogo chased after me shouting for me to shut up and to “stop making that fucking din”, that if I didn’t, they would really fuck me up. I was too scared to hear anything they were saying and just carried on screaming, shouting and trying to get away, at on point I remember tipping a load of bales down on top of them, and that really did piss them off. I think Rogo got hurt in some way, because I heard him cussing and threatening that he would break my neck when he caught me. Next thing I knew the bales seemed to crumble under me and I was tumberling, along with the bales to end up flat on my back on the floor, with the wind blown out of me, at the feet of Rogo who grabbed me with glee. “Right you little bastard, your really going to get it now!” he yelled shaking me like a rag doll. The dog was barking and prancing around getting excited with all the activity and noise that was going on. The lads were all very angry by this time and Rogo practically threw me across the bale, as Bimmy stuffed the gag back into my mouth.

Two of them held me down as Jad bought the dog around behind us, I was struggling and trying to kick, but it was all to no avail, my shouting was muffled and deep inside, I really believed that they wouldn’t dare to carry out their threat, but that didn’t stop me being scared. “Go on then,”, urged Rogo “get it up on him”. Suddenly I felt the heavy weight of the dog land on my back and its fore paws clamp around my hips, its hairy flanks pressing against my naked rump. I was now truly terrified, I couldn’t move, hearing the lads laughing and sniggering, when I felt the dog begin to hump at me. At first I could only feel its sheath pressing against my arse, then something hard and pointed began to prod the cheeks of my arse missing its mark, first one side then the other. I did my best to move so that it would be successful but then Bimmy realised what I was doing and I felt hands grab my ankles and hold them wide apart. The lads laughed even more as they joked about the dog rutting with a piglet. I jumped violently as I felt the pointed end of the dogs prick penitrate my arsehole, I screamed within my gag as I wriggled my hips in a desperate attempt to shake the dog off me, only to feel him grip my hips tighter as his long slippery finger shaped prong pushed past my sphincter and into my colon. I automatically clenched my arse muscles as tight as I could and started to scream into my gag, but this only seemed to excite the beast even more, for its thrusts became more determined and I could feel its prick elongating and expanding inside me, as it plungedeven deeper into my guts. My muffled screams of “Noooo, Nooo, Nooo, Oooo!” Were accompanied by the lads shouts of “Yah, Yah, go, go , go.” The dogwas really poundinghis dog-meat into my rear end. I can’t honestly say that it was painful (at the begining!) because the intrusive prick had been so thin, pointed and slippery when it had penitrated me, that it was no different than a small medical probe, but now, as the blood began to pump into it, the plunging member began to grow and sank deeper into my innards with each forcful thrust. The thickness and the depth was becoming very uncomfortable, but not painful…Yet! I didn’t feel dirty, degraded or disgusted, what I felt was shock, shock that these lads would do something like this to another person, to me! Put me through something as horrible as this. I felt sick, as though everything had been pushed up into my stomach. The dog began to hump faster as one of the lads shouted ” Get ready boy, he’s going to shoot you full of dog com”. I didn’t feel anything, except the pounding prick inside me seemed to grow so thick and long that I feared it would rupture my insides, then a lump started to expand just inside my sphincter at the root of its prick, it grew bigger until it seemed as though it were the size of a peach stretching my colon to breaking point. The humping action of the dog began to slow and his body seemed to stiffen, then after a moment, he thrust deeper into me than he had so far, as deep as he could, I felt his ball sack bang against the cheeks of my arse as he let out a deep throated howl and I felt a weirdsensation deep inside of me, it seemed like a rush of water but more concentrated, like a jet, which spurted again andd again flooding my insides. The spurting went on and on, I wondered how much those balls held, my intestines were filled to bursting point and yet it still poured into me. Then as the spurting eased off to a dribble, the pain really started. The lump (knot) at the root of its prick seemed immense and felt as though it was almost splitting my sphincter, as the dog tried but couldn’t seem to withdraw. For a few moments the dog rested on my back, then I felt his legs leave my waist and expeirienced a horrendous tearing pain as he turned soits arse was against mine, the knot twisting within my colon and yanking on my arse ring almost tearing it out. The pain was excruciating as he tried to pull free from me, but we were tied together. I was gritting my teeth and doing a lot of “Ahhh” ing. It suddenly pulled free and it felt as though my sphincter had torn completely out, the pain was indiscribable and I thought for a moment that I was going to black out, but I didn’t, I just started screaming again. The dog walked past me and I saw what had been inside me, its prick was still hanging down under its belly, even though it had begun to shrink it was still about as thick as a pitchfork handle and six to eight inches long. I was still sobbing as one of themgave me a shove with his boot on my behind and toppled me onto the floor. As I lay there in a feotal position, Tad pointed at me, “Look at that, he’s got a hard on, does that prove that the dirty little bastard is the other way?” “Well… even though he made a fuss, I think, by looking at that little stalk, that he must have got a real buzz from being fucked”, observed Bimmy in a serious voice and added “Dirty little dog fucker” jabbing me non to gently in the ribs with his boot. “Well he certainly seemed to be turned on with that little tango with Rex didn’t he? Perhaps he’s turned on by being shagged by animals” said Rogo. They left me laying on the floor as Tad leaned over me and whispered “You say anything about what happened and we will kill you, OK?” I didn’t answer, so he nuddged me with his toe and repeated “OK?” I nodded and they walked out laughing, “I didn’t really think the dog would actually shag him, did you?” I heard Bimmy say, “No, but did you see the size of the prick he took? and didn’t that dog go once it was up his arse” came the answer. They all laughed as they left the barn. After a while I gathered up my clothes and dressed myself, noting that there was blood mixed with a thickwatery substance running down my legs from my torn arse hole. Then I walked slowly back to my room feeling sore and sort of shriveled inside.

Continued in chapter two