Dear diary,
Went to Wendy’s birthday party today. My birthday too by the way but we made a deal to have the parties on different days. Sucks our birthdays are on the same day. I’m older though! By a whole year. Thirteen today yay! I’m a teenager now. Lost my virginity there too I think. Looked it up online, says “when a man and a woman have vaginal sex”. Pretty sure that’s what happened. Not quite a woman yet but I don’t think that matters.
Dad drove me there. I wore the sun dress grandma Connor got me for my last birthday. It’s kinda tight now, guess I’ve grown a little over the last year. Still love the dress though, you know the one, its red, with the white lace around the edges and the flower pattern on it. Put it on this morning and thought it had shrunk! Last year it came down to just above my knees but now it covers about half my thighs lol. Mom thought it was too short now but dad said it was fine. Really warm today too. On the way to the party, my legs keep sticking to the leather of the car seat, really sticky and uncomfortable. Dad was looking at me a bit funny, he kept looking at my legs as I shifted. When we pulled up to Wendy’s house I took off my seat belt and reached into the back seat to get her present, a game for her Wii, I think she loves it. While I was back there I could feel dad leaning towards my butt and I swear I felt his breath on my thighs. When I turned back though he was sitting normally looking out the window.
We got out and I skipped to the house, dad walking behind me. I could see the balloons in her back yard and the top of a bouncy castle, I love bouncy castles. We went into the back yard and I gave Wendy her present and wished her happy birthday. She ripped open the game and hugged me, thanking me. Dad told me was going inside with the rest of the parents and told me to be careful. I promised I would and hugged him, feeling something hard press against my belly. I didn’t take any notice at the time and ran back to the party. Me and Wendy ate some cake and drank some coke talking about school. “I wanna go on the bouncy castle Wend.” I said, feeling a buzz from the sugar and wanting to run around. I grabbed her hand and we ran to the castle.
Reading the sign on the door, I sat down on the grass and untied my shoes. I remember twiddling my toes, enjoying the warm air on them. Looking up at the house I saw dad looking at me again, his eyes seemed to roam over my body. It made me blush and feel a little weird but kinda nice at the same time. Me and Wendy hopped into the bouncy castle with the other kids and jumped around. We laughed and shrieked, I swear I jumped five feet high one time. But then Billy, that jerk, jumped into me. He was being too rough anyway. His elbow hit me on the chin, knocking me backward and out the door of the castle. Landed on my knees, scraped um bad. Started crying really loud, what? it hurt and I was bleeding! I picked myself up off the ground and ran to the house yelling for dad.
Inside, dad hugged me and asked what happened. I explained through sobs and pointed to my knees. He looked down at them and sighed. As he looked back up his eyes lingered on my thighs. I realized the dress had rode up on me, showing more of my legs. I quickly patted it down and he looked at my face again. He asked Wendy’s mom if she had a first aid kit. She was lookin at us kinda funny and told him there was a first aid kit in the bathroom. He took my hand and led me up there. I sat on the toilet and he opened the cabinet behind the mirror. He kneeled down in front of me with a cloth and a bottle in his hand. “This is gonna sting a bit baby girl,” he said. I bit my lip and nodded, closing my eyes. As the cloth touched my knee I let out a little scream, my eyes watering. “Shh shh…” he said softly “it’s okay.”.
He cleaned my cuts and put the cork back on the bottle. “Thanks dad,” I said, feeling better and starting to get up. “Wait,” he said putting his hand on my shoulder. “Gotta make sure it’s clean.” He knelt in front of me again and put his hands on my knees. “They’re clean dad, feels better now.” He grabbed my legs just above the knees, his hands are really big, they closed easily around my legs. “You love me Shauna, right?” he said, his voice husky. “Sure I do dad,” I whispered, a little scared. “I love you too baby, I wanna make you feel good.” He bent down and started to kiss my knees. I gasped a little at the pain as his lips touched my cuts. I felt his tongue snaking out and licking me. I blushed, felt dirty when he kissed me like that. “Dad, no..” I whispered and pulled my legs together. “It’s okay hun, trust me.” he said. He leaned up to me and kissed me on the lips. Could feel his tongue in my mouth, big and rough. When he stopped I put my hand to my tingling lips, still tasting him. “I trust you dad,” I said and relaxed my legs.
He gently pushed my legs apart and ran his hands slowly up my inner thighs. Being touched there made me feel strange. Felt like I never have before. My whole body felt warm, hot even. Dad pushed my sundress up to my hips, exposing my legs. I’ve never minded the tan line where my shorts usually are before, but for some reason having dad see it made me feel dirty. He started to kiss my legs, slowing moving towards my hips. The closer he got to them, the warmer I became. He stopped and stood up. I could see a big bulge in his pants. He lifted my dress above my arms so I that there naked, except for my panties. I crossed my arms over my chest and looked at the floor. I was embarrassed about how small my breasts are. Most of the other girls in my class have started to grow but I still haven’t. Dad gently uncrossed my arms and put his hands on my nipples, squeezing them between his fingers. I gasped, feeling sore and somehow good at the same time. He knelt down again, closer this time and leant towards my chest. I could feel his breath hot against my nipples. My nipples felt strange, like they were suddenly too tight. As I looked down at him he put his mouth around my nipples and began to suck on them. I moaned without meaning to as his lips covered my breasts. Somehow the sucking relieved some of the tightness. When he finished I looked down at my chest. I saw that my chest had grown slightly, not a lot but a bit. I smiled, I have breasts!, I thought. My nipples were red and shiny, bigger than usual.
Dad stood up and unzipped his pants. He reached in to them and pulled out something I’d never seen before. Looked like a big hotdog but pink! I stared at it, wondering. “Shauna…” dad said. I looked up at him.” I want you to touch it.” I reached out and poked it with my finger. Dad laughed and said “no, grab it gently.” I nodded and did what he said, holding it. It felt warm, stiff and soft. As I touched it dad inhaled sharply. I looked up at him and he smiled “feels good baby,” he said “stroke it.” I began to rub it, running my hand up and down it. Dad started breathing more heavily as I did, closing his eyes. I began to speed up. I grabbed it with both hands, running them up and down it. It’s bigger than the width of both my hands! The pink part at the end still poked out. I looked up into dads face as I rubbed it. I saw how good it made him feel and smiled.
The thing in my hands began to pulse and I took my hands away, startled. Dad, still breathing heavy grabbed my chin and kissed me again. He whispered into my ear “Put it in your mouth Shauna,” what? I thought. I thought about saying no but I remembered what he said about trusting him, and I nodded. I opened my mouth as wide as I could and waited for him. He moved his waist towards my mouth and stopped. I moved towards the thing and tried to put it in my mouth but I couldn’t open wide enough! Dad pushed forward, holding my head and it slid into my mouth. It hurt a bit diary, the corners of my lips tore a bit, could taste blood. Still holding my head, dad started to push in. all I had to do was sit there but dad was loving it. He was panting like a dog. He started to move back and forth, going deeper every time. I felt it touch the back of my throat and I gagged, trying not be sick. Dad kept going and as it touched my throat the second time I managed not to gag. He went so far in I couldn’t breathe. The hairs on his hips tickled my nose. I just sat there as he thrust until I had to breathe. I pulled away, coughing. A string of spit hung from my mouth. Without saying anything he grabbed my panties and pulled them down. He stood above me panting, looking at my crotch. I noticed that he had a lot of hair round his crotch while I had none. He had a strange look in his eyes as he looked at me.
He grabbed me by the shoulders and stood me up. I stood in front of him, looking at the ground, my hair dangling in front of my face. I winced as his fingers dug into my shoulders. He spun me around and faced me toward the bath. He bent me over. I put my hands on the bath to support myself as his hands touched me. He grabbed my hips and stood behind me. I could feel his thing rubbing against my butt. He grabbed my butt cheeks and spread them. I could feel it rubbing against my vagina. “Dad…” I said. “This is gonna hurt baby,” he panted “but then it’s gonna feel real nice.” “Wait,” I whispered but he didn’t. He thrust into me, his thing going inside me. I screamed then, it hurt bad. Felt like I was being torn in two. Then I felt his hand close over my mouth, muffling me.
The pain made me collapse over the bath. My feet didn’t seem to work anymore. I could still feel my dad inside me though, could feel it filling me up. Dad started to pump inside me as I lay over the bath rim. His hand stopped me from making noise. I could feel a wetness between my legs, feel something dripping down. He kept moving in and out of me, hurting me. I think I almost passed out. As the feeling came back to my legs I tried to stand up but I couldn’t , my bare feet scrabbled on the tiles. I started to cry then, the tears rolling onto dads hand. He kept doing it, I could hear him panting behind me. Then something changed. His breathing became ragged and I could feel the thing begin to pulse inside me. Dad gave a little cry then and I felt the thing inside me stiffen. Then I felt a new wetness, this one deeper in me and hotter. Dad released his grip on my mouth and pulled his thing out of me, still breathing hard.
As I struggled to stand up over the bath, I heard him zipping up his pants. I stood up, naked, and looked at him. He wouldn’t meet my gaze. I looked down and saw blood between my feet. I put my hand between my legs and felt more wetness there. When I took my hand away, I saw more blood and something like milk on my fingers. There was a smell that reminded me of the seaside. Dad took some tissue from the roll and mopped up the blood on the floor, he then took some more and wiped between my legs. I was unsure what to do so I kissed him on the cheek.
He smiled then and looked at me. he picked up my dress from the floor and handed it to me. as I stepped into it he touched my shoulder. I looked up at him and he told me that what just happened was our secret. “Don’t tell anyone Shauna, ever..” “I promise daddy” I told him. I went back to the party and he went back to the parents. He told me that it would feel good eventually. Can’t wait till that day diary. I think I like having sex…

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