plz feel free to com and mail

Every day a 4th grade boy walks home from school past a 4th grade girl’s house. One day he he stops to taunt the little girl. He holds up the football and says “See this football? Football is a boys game and girls can’t have one!”
The little girl runs in the house crying and tells her mother about the encounter. She runs out and buys the girl a football. The next day the boy is riding home on his bike, and the girl shows him the football, yelling “Nah na nah na nah”.
The little boy gets mad and points to his bike. “See this bike? This is a boys bike, and girls can’t have them!”
Next day, the boy comes by and the little girl is riding a new boys bike. Now he is really mad. So he drops his pants, points at his private parts, and says “You see THIS? Only BOYS have these and your mother can’t go buy you one!”
The next day as he passes the house he asks the little girl “Well, what do you have to say NOW?”
So she pulls up her dress, points to her private part and says “My mother told me that as long as I have one of these, I can have as many of THOSE as I want!”

Read 55668 times |
Rated 72.9 % |
(680 votes)

Vote list (Close) :

Please rate this text:   

The cops raided the local brothel and had all of the girls standing in line
waiting to enter the paddy wagon. A little old lady walked up and asked one
of the girls what the line was for. The girl sarcastically stated that they
were handing out lollipops. The little old lady, having missed the sarcasm,
liked the idea of getting free lollipops, so she got in line, too. When she
got up to the paddy wagon door, a cop said, “Hey grandma, aren’t you a little
old to be doing this?” She replied, “As long as they keep making them, I’ll
keep sucking them.”

Read 91971 times |
Rated 73.1 % |
(950 votes)

Vote list (Close) :Oz_Homer
: POSITIVECheese Traveler
: POSITIVE

Please rate this text:   

A kid comes home from school and says to his mom, “Mom I’ve got a problem.”
She says “Tell me.” He tells her that the boys at school are using 2 words he doesn’t understand. She asks him what they are.
He says “well, pussy and bitch”.
She says “Oh That’s no big deal, pussy is a cat like our little Mittens, and bitch is a female dog like our Sandy.”
He thanks her and goes to visit dad in the workshop in the basement. He says to his dad, “Dad the boys at school are using words I don’t know, and I asked mom and I don’t think she told me the exact meaning.
Dad says “Son, I told you never to go to mom with these matters, she cant handle them. What are the words?”
He tells him…pussy and bitch.
Dad says “OK” and pulls a Playboy down from the shelf, takes a marker and circles the pubic area of the centerfold and says, “son, everything inside this circle, is pussy.”
“OK dad, so what’s a bitch?”
“Son” he says, “everything outside that circle.”

Read 94431 times |
Rated 73.4 % |
(1137 votes)

Vote list (Close) :loves2hav4play
: POSITIVENoPerks
: POSITIVEDirty Samone
: POSITIVE

Please rate this text:   

its not mine.

Jack wakes up at home with a huge hangover he can’t believe. He forces
himself to open his eyes, and the first things he sees are a couple of
aspirins next to a glass of water on the side table.
And, next to them, a single red rose!
Jack sits down and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean and pressed.
Jack looks around the room and sees that it is in perfect order, spotlessly clean. So is the rest of the house.
He takes the aspirins, cringes when he sees a huge black eye staring back at him in the bathroom mirror, and notices a note on the table:
“Honey, breakfast is on the stove, I left early to go shopping–Love you!”
Jack stumbles to the kitchen and sure enough, there is a hot breakfast and the morning newspaper. His son is also at the table, eating. Jack asks, “Son…what happened last night?”
“Well, you came home after 3 A.M., drunk and out of your mind. You broke some furniture, puked in the hallway, and got that black eye when you ran into the door.”
“So, why is everything in such perfect order, so clean, I have a rose, and breakfast is on the table waiting for me?”
His son replies, “Oh THAT!… Mom dragged you to the bedroom, and when she tried to take your pants off, you screamed, “Leave me alone, lady, I’m married!”
Broken furniture – $85.26
Hot Breakfast – $4.20
Red Rose bud -$3.00
Two Aspirins -$.38
Saying the right thing, at the right time………Priceless.

Read 162264 times |
Rated 78.2 % |
(1951 votes)

Vote list (Close) :1c.c.
: POSITIVELookinthecloset
: POSITIVEphatphot
: POSITIVEjimmywhite2000
: POSITIVEOz_Homer
: POSITIVEanuraag
: POSITIVEmadtank86
: POSITIVEkinkykaty
: POSITIVEAxAnder
: POSITIVEJenryu
: POSITIVEkashton
: POSITIVEZaxby69
: POSITIVELoverGurl818
: POSITIVEBig_Black_Boy82
: POSITIVEnuderver
: POSITIVECheese Traveler
: POSITIVE6kittykat9
: POSITIVEwilantean
: POSITIVEBisexualFreak
: POSITIVEboatbob2
: POSITIVEHOM1954
: POSITIVEmoller
: POSITIVExXBrokenStarXx239
: POSITIVEHambone2
: POSITIVEterraria321
: POSITIVEcockworshippertranny
: POSITIVEcraiger
: POSITIVEbikerbill7
: POSITIVEViewer1060
: POSITIVEyoung15_
: POSITIVEHarold Warbridge
: POSITIVE

Please rate this text:   

Nothing past the critics

mình là boy

womens rights. sorry about the next part………….————————————-pokkjhyytttttttttttttttttttttttttjjkll…,,,,,,,,l,`…,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,……………………………….,……..,………..,…………………………………………………………../……………………………………/……@………………………………………………………………………………..n njjb n n mmmmmkkmmmmmmmmmm.kl:llkjbb m m mm’ v7mv nbb,xk ,o o i h b .. b gg b n bn nn jjn khyn

Read 25944 times |
Rated 27.7 % |
(466 votes)

Vote list (Close) :Wimmers
: NEGATIVELonelyandlost
: NEGATIVEandypanda
: POSITIVEDrinkMe
: NEGATIVE

Please rate this text:   

Mom and son…….
Son1: Chan
Son2: Jack
MOM: Your father will be released from prison by this year after his 15 years of jail life…..
Jack: ho! It is good to hear !!
I have an idea to suprise him mom…
Mom: whats that honey ??
Jack: we should Fuck immediately and suprise him with our new baby brother !!
Mom: ho! Jack baby! You itself a big suprise for him boy!!
Jack: how mom ??
Mom: you just born to me and to your big brother…
Actually Chan is our only child……
Chan: yes! My son Jack !!
Iam your father ….
Jack: what the Fuck !!…..

Read 99285 times |
Rated 28.5 % |
(267 votes)

Vote list (Close) :Ed Itor
: NEGATIVEPandorius999
: NEGATIVE

Please rate this text:   

really bad joke

Q: how do you make a little boy cry twice?
A: wipe your bloody dick on his teddy bear

Read 47985 times |
Rated 30.9 % |
(855 votes)

Vote list (Close) :

Please rate this text:   

A man decides he wants to purchase him some pussy. First he asks a woman on the street where he might go and she told him the building on the corner had the best pussy in town on the third floor. So when he got there he rung the bell. A beautiful voluptuous woman answers the door and say in a sexy voice “what would you like sugar pudding don’t get no sweeter than what I got”. The man replied ” I’ll like to make a purchase how much” and the lady replies ” hundred big ones daddy”. The man ” cries I only got twenty “. The lady took pity on him sending him to the second floor promising they are cheaper. The man goes down stairs and rings the bell. A pretty woman answer the door and says in cute voice ” whats your pleasure sir” and the man replies ” how much for a little pleasure”. The lady replies ” seventy- five and you can do as you please baby”. The man sadly states he only has twenty so she sends him to the first floor. The man gets to the door and notice there’s no bell so he knock on the door. A woman comes to the door looking like she had seen better days. “You have fifty dollars and I’m all yours” to this the man cries ” I only have twenty but if you pee in my hat its yours”. The woman did and the man left. In the alley he said to his dick ” drink soup mother fucker because the price of meat is to high”!!!

Read 18969 times |
Rated 32.9 % |
(213 votes)

Vote list (Close) :HOM1954
: POSITIVE01elad
: NEGATIVE

Please rate this text:   

In walked a man looking for some company and the first woman he sees he approached. “Hey baby how about a date.” The woman smacks him and walks away. Next the man approach a woman sitting alone at a table. “Hello daring how about a date.” The woman politely tells him no and walks away. Then in walks a woman who looks like an Amazon goddess. The man says “sweetheart how about we have us a good time.” The goddess replies “sure lets go to my place!” After they get done having the worst sex she has ever had she asks for $200. To this the man replies with a chuckle, “this is when the ladies usually pay him to leave and never come back!”

Read 17217 times |
Rated 33.6 % |
(244 votes)

Vote list (Close) :Harmlessfun
: NEGATIVEbatang_tripper02
: POSITIVE01elad
: NEGATIVE

Please rate this text:   

nope

this is my first time writing so cut me some slack

Bill clinton was sitting at the presedents desk
signing important papers,
suddenly his sexy new secratary walks over
Bill clinton gets a hard on.
his secratary notices and says
“Bill you have 2 heads,
unforantly you only have enouph blood to run one at a time
so stop using the smaller one
and grow a pair”

Read 32274 times |
Rated 34.2 % |
(365 votes)

Vote list (Close) :byronnnn
: POSITIVE

Please rate this text:   

Donna calls for Princess.

A guy gets home late one night and his wife says, “Where the hell have you been?”
Him: “I was out getting a tattoo.”
Her: “A tattoo?” “What kind of tattoo did you get? ”
Him: “I got a hundred dollar bill on my penis.”
Her: “What the hell were you thinking? Why did you get a hundred dollar bill on your penis?”
Him: “Well, number one, I like to watch my money grow . . .
Number two, once in a while, I like to play with my money . . .
Third, I like how money feels in my hand . . .
And lastly, instead of you going out shopping, you can stay right here at home and blow a hundred bucks anytime you want!”

Read 712949 times |
Rated 34.9 % |
(102607 votes)

Vote list (Close) :ihave7inch
: POSITIVEcannonman
: POSITIVESatan’s Boy Pussy
: POSITIVEpunkiedoo
: POSITIVELeahR
: POSITIVEThe_R_Man
: POSITIVEsection9
: POSITIVECynthia Purrple
: POSITIVEcraiger
: POSITIVESimplekid91
: POSITIVE

Please rate this text:   

politics

A woman answers the door to a market researcher. “Good morning madam, I’m doing some research for Vaseline. Do you use it at all in your household?”
“Oh yes, all the time. It’s very good for cuts, grazes and burns.”
“Do you use it for anything else?”
“Like what?”
“Ahem.. err.. well.. during.. ahem.. sex.”
“Oh, of course. Yes, I smear it on the bedroom doorknob to keep my husband out!”

Read 355879 times |
Rated 35.9 % |
(31489 votes)

Vote list (Close) :

Please rate this text:   

‘I can suck’

ok 2 guys are working at a dead end job one is white and the other is black the white guy is always happy and the black wanted to know why so he asked him why are you happy all the time well the white guy says i get some every night well the blank guy is shocked so he asks how so the man said powms so the black guy comes in the next morning all beat to shit and the white guy asks why so the black guy says i tryed the poitry shit did not work so the white guy asks what he said so he said he told her black bitch black bitch fat as a hog why dont you roll over so i can fuck you like a dog
thank you

Read 14091 times |
Rated 37 % |
(108 votes)

Vote list (Close) :the gentlemen
: NEGATIVE

Please rate this text:   

After a few years of married life, this guy finds that he is unable to get it up anymore. He goes to his doctor, his doctor tries a few things but nothing works.
Finally the doctor says to him “this is all in your mind”, and refers him to a psychiatrist.
After a few visits to the shrink, the shrink confesses “I am at a loss as to how you could possibly be cured.”
Finally the psychiatrist refers him to a witch doctor.
The witch doctor tells him, “I can cure this”, and throws some powder on a flame, and there is a flash with billowing blue smoke….
The witch doctor says “This is powerful healing but you can only use it once a year! All you have to do is say ‘1 2 3’ and it shall rise for as long as you wish!”
The guy then asks the witch doctor “What happens after when its over?”.
The witch doctor says “all you have to say is ‘1 2 3 4’ and it will go down”. “But be warned it will not work again for 3 months!”
This guy goes home and that night is ready to surprise his wife with the good news… So he is lying in bed with her and says “1 2 3”, and suddenly he gets a hard-on.
His wife turns over and says “What did you say ‘1 2 3’ for?”

Read 260789 times |
Rated 37.1 % |
(10430 votes)

Vote list (Close) :

Please rate this text: